Joey Barton in hot water again
Joey Barton is not unfamiliar with finding himself in water of the hot kind, and he was back in it after his Bristol Rovers side were beaten 3-1 by Newport. His players, he said after the game, had “a holocaust, a nightmare, an absolute disaster”.
It is, of course, generally advisable not to use the word holocaust to describe an under-par football performance, many a gaffer getting themselves in trouble for doing so over the years - like the time Brian Laws, then Scunthorpe manager, called his team’s defending against Doncaster Rovers “as bad as the holocaust”.
Joey was called upon to apologise, but instead took to Twitter to quote 13th century Persian poet Rumi, like you do: “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass, the world is too full to talk about.”
Not everyone felt that tweet put an end to the matter, so at his pre match press conference, Joey issued a heartfelt sorry. Kidding. “If anyone was offended,” it began, so you know yourself, not really an apology at all. As Rumi once put it (thanks Google), “forget safety, live where you fear to live, destroy your reputation, be notorious.”
Word of mouth
"We live in an era where it's seen as quite normal to ask people to be sacked. If you were in any other workplace and you walked in to a shop and you said, 'I want you to be sacked', I think you would be reported to the police." Phil Neville likening calls for Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's firing to approaching a shop assistant and telling them you'd quite like them to receive a P45.
"It felt like we were a boxer being punch drunk. You see Tyson Fury when he gets knocked down a few times, he takes a count of five, six, seven, he gets up and goes again. We got up too early." Solskjaer on his lads being put on the canvas by Liverpool, getting up, and being floored all over again.
Quote of the week
"A wise woman once said, half horse half human." Niamh Farrelly paying tribute to her team-mate Heather Payne after she took on Finland at a canter.
By the numbers
12,000,000 - That's how many Euros Ronald Koeman will, reportedly, receive as compensation for being sacked by Barcelona. He won't go hungry, then.
No love lost for Pjanic and Koeman
Miralem Pjanic and Ronald Koeman? No love lost. Especially after Koeman let the Bosnian midfielder go on loan to Besiktas in September, deciding he had no use for the fella.
So, when Koeman was fired last week, how did Pjanic react? He took to Instagram and typed: “Know when to let that shit go.” Rude.
You’d be guessing here that the club might have had a word, because the post was swiftly deleted and replaced with this: “In a world where everyone’s eyes are glued to their screens, it’s very easy to misquote someone and place them out of context …. I wish Ronald Koeman the best of luck in his future journey.” He never did explain, though, quite how he was misquoted.
More word of mouth
"We play in the best league in the world and it is a privilege for Daniel [FARKE]to go up against Thomas Tuchel or Marcelo Bielsa. If we don't want that, let's ring up West Brom and see if they want another go and we will piss off back there [the Championship] and play Peterborough." Norwich City's form this season has put their sporting director Stuart Webber in a bit of a mood.
"We're shooting from everywhere …. our front three looked like velociraptors in Jurassic Park!" Liverpool assistant Pep Lijnders on his team's attacking performance against the fallen kingdom that is Manchester United.
"If I don't vote for me, who will vote? I want to have at least one vote." Chelsea and Italy's Jorginho, chuffed to be on the shortlist for the 2021 Ballon d'Or, but concerned that he'll lose his deposit. (Actually, he's voting for Kevin de Bruyne, so you'd hope the Belgian will return the favour).
