It was back in 2021 that Carlo Ancelotti was asked to compare managing Real Madrid with the club he left to join them, Everton. “It’s better to have a Ferrari than a Fiat 500,” he replied, a bit rudely. And yes, lest you were wondering, Everton was the Fiat.
Last year, not long before he was sacked, a despairing Valencia coach Ruben Baraja complained about how little money he’d had to spend on his struggling squad. “I may want a Ferrari, but I have to drive a Skoda.”
And earlier this year, Paul Parker commented on his old club Manchester United and their unending woes. “Quite a few players need to be dropped, but who do you replace them with? It’s like if your Ferrari’s not been performing well and you want to use your other car, but that other car is a Ford Focus.”
Spotting a trend here? Well, Brendan Rodgers has extended it. “There’s no way you’ll go in to a race and be given the keys to a Honda Civic and say, ‘I want you to drive it like a Ferrari’,” he said after watching his side Celtic play like jalopies in their defeat by Dundee.
But a game later, after they beat Sturm Graz in the Europa League? “We weren’t quite the Ferrari – a Range Rover Sport, I would have thought. Hopefully, we have no more Morris Minors in the performance – not that they’re a bad car,” he said attempting to speedily reverse. “It’s a fantastic car.”
Football’s fondness for Ferraris shows no sign of abating, then, but, alas, Celtic were Morris Minors again in Sunday’s defeat by Hearts.
QUOTE
“I was a bit disappointed. Somebody said to me, “who do you think should play you?”. I said “Denzel Washington”.”
Mick McCarthy on how gutted he was when he heard that Steve Coogan, and not Denzel, would play him in the ‘Saipan’ movie.
NUMBER: 100
That’s how many caps Katie McCabe will have to her name if she plays against Belgium tomorrow – and 31 goals is a half decent tally for someone who’s usually a left-back.
WORD OF MOUTH
“The Italian championship is pitiful, it offers no emotion. The quality is really low. Watching some matches is a chore. There is no rhythm, no spectacle. It’s an embarrassing situation, almost shameful.”
Former Italy striker Antonio Cassano bigging up Serie A.
“There is so much going on. The players and club deserve 100 per cent Oliver Glasner. It’s not about Oliver Glasner’s thoughts. It’s also the chairman, all the employees and the owners.”
Crystal Palace boss Oliver Glasner is now the bookies’ favourite for the 2025 ‘Talking About Yourself In The Third Person’ award.
“I saw some guys drinking tea with milk – that is something I don’t quite understand.”
Ruben Amorim, still adapting to life in Blighty.
Antonio Conte has a few choice words for Martinez
It was an odd few days for Napoli – throttled 6-2 by PSV Eindhoven in the Champions League, but then they saw off one of their closest title rivals, beating Inter Milan 3-1 to go back to the top of the table.
And after being uncharacteristically quiet on the touchline during the PSV game, Napoli boss Antonio Conte was his more usual self come Saturday. “I was definitely less aggressive,” he said. “Next time I’ll bring the whip and stroll like a tiger tamer.”
That he did, especially during a, well, chat with a former player of his, Lautaro Martinez. Unhappy with a challenge from Inter full-back Denzel Dumfries, Conte let it be known that he wasn’t best pleased, at which point Martinez made a “yap, yap” gesture with his hand towards him.
According to Football Italia, there followed this exchange between the pair. Martinez: “You **** yourself!” Conte (pointing towards his crotch): “Wrap your laughing gear around this!”
It could be that something was lost in translation, but whatever, Conte found his whip, so to speak.
MORE WORD OF MOUTH
“Sarri was showing him the movements he was supposed to make on set-pieces. He was a bit annoyed. He didn’t need instructions – he tore up some grass, smelled it and chewed it.”
Former Juventus defender Gianluca Frabotta on Cristiano Ronaldo’s unique way of showing his then Juve gaffer Maurizio Sarri that he knew where the goal was.
“He sometimes dribbles like Messi, but sometimes he looks like a fourth division player.”
Chris Waddle on PSG’s Ballon d’Or-winning Ousmane Dembele having the look of an Accrington Stanley employee at times.
“It’s better to do things with hair. If you see me, for example, without the hair, I will not be the same Cristiano. So many people don’t care if they have hair or not. I believe with hair, you’re looking better. So this is just my opinion.”
Don’t expect Ronaldo to go bald any day soon.
