Sir, – If we want to make the Irish presidential election more Trumpian, should we just vote for the first candidate who can convert the GPO into a hotel by October 26th? – Yours, etc,
DERMOT O’ROURKE,
Lucan,
Co Dublin.
Sir, – If Pope Francis can fulfil a hectic 36-hour schedule to Ireland at the age of 82, who says Michael D Higgins at the age of 77 can’t manage a further seven-year tenure in the Áras?
He’s more sprightly than ever, and we are lucky to have such a cultured man as our President. – Yours, etc,
PAULINE CAHILL,
Blackrock,
Co Dublin.
Sir, – An announcement regarding my intentions to run for the office of Uachtarán na hÉireann is imminent. Please stand by. – Yours, etc,
PJ McDERMOTT,
Westport,
Co Mayo.
Sir, – Has anyone noticed the similarity of our presidential election to the X Factor TV show? Apparently anyone can apply for either. Both contests feature regional auditions before a somewhat self-regarding panel. In each show, the applicants will be a varied bunch, possibly on a journey, the most common factors being their conspicuous lack of relevant credentials and their inability to spot this.
Shortlisted candidates get to perform live on TV and the overall winner is then chosen by public vote.
I can hardly wait. – Yours, etc,
KEVIN O’SULLIVAN,
Dublin 7.
Sir, – Waiting for Sean Gallagher’s announcement on his intentions to run for the Park was like the long wait for the third secret of Fatima.
I was beside myself with excitement! – Yours, etc,
FRANK WALSH,
Malahide.
Co Dublin.