It was just as well Mary Lou McDonald didn’t mention the other pensions.

Spontaneous combustion is never a pretty sight.

Ah yes, TDs’ pensions: there’s nothing quite like them for boiling the blood.

Sinn Féin’s deputy leader had a lot of questions down for answer by the Minister for Public Reform during his stint in the chamber. So many, in fact, that Brendan Howlin remarked: “Janey Mac! Did you get lucky with the draw?”

This, we presume, related to the number of questions she managed to get on the order paper compared to others.

“So it seems,” murmured Mary Lou, impatient to get going.

But Brendan wanted to harp on about her good fortune in getting so many questions selected for oral answer.

“Did you win the Lotto?” he smirked.

“I assure you, Brendan, that I’ll never win the Lotto,” she retorted.

Funny though, that Mr Howlin happened to have the Lotto on his mind when answering questions about ministerial pensions. McDonald had asked for a list of the annual pension payments to former ministers and taoisigh, sorted from high to low and – most importantly – “including the recipients’ names”.

You might have thought that names would be automatically furnished along with the figures. But, then again, Lotto winners have the right to remain anonymous, so most of the individuals on the larger pensions would probably prefer to remain anonymous too.

Unremarkable stints

As it turned out, Brendan had a list as long as your arm of former ministers and ministers of state. All the big names from the recent political past are on it, but it was also a bit of a trip down memory lane in respect of junior ministers long forgotten for unremarkable stints in Government departments back in old God’s time.

They may not be in the Bertie Ahern/Brian Cowen high-roller bracket, but a large number of them have been pulling in a tidy little few bob since they left politics behind. And the thing is: they are also getting a Dáil pension on top of the ministerial pension. For some, this can add an extra €45,000 to their final whack.

Mary Lou omitted to mention this yesterday when the Minister read out the first 10 or so names on his list. He could have read out all of them, but he explained the list “is long and would take up more time than I have available to read it”.

It wouldn’t be great for the blood pressure either.

Ahern and Cowen are in joint first place, on €80,810.86 each per annum. Next is John Bruton on €72,908.04.

Add in their Dáil pensions and they easily clear the €100k barrier.

Then comes former PD leader and tánaiste Michael McDowell. He’s an interesting one, coming in at €64,958.14. McDowell, a successful senior counsel, has put measures in place whereby his pension goes to charity.

Brendan Howlin pointed out that all the amounts shown were net of public service pension reduction. He added that, in certain cases, the amounts shown don’t reflect what is actually paid out. This is “where an individual is ‘gifting’ all or part of his or her pension to the State, or where a pension is subject to certain provisions of the family law acts”.

At least Mary Lou would have been familiar with the “gifting” end of things as she, along with her party colleagues, only takes home the average national wage. The rest of it is “gifted” – not to the State but to Sinn Féin.

Anyway, Howlin read out the first lucky 13 on the list. Charlie McCreevy just making the cut on a measly €54,812.68 (plus Dáil pension).

When the Minister finished speaking, McDonald arched a disdainful eyebrow.

“And so it rolls . . .” she replied.

It’s not the first time that these figures have been discussed in the Dáil, noted McDonald. And every time they are put into the public domain, she was struck by the contrast between these “bumper pensions” and the low wages of so many workers in the civil and public service.

This disparity was mentioned earlier by her and the Minister pointed out that he had taken “clear action” in the Haddington Road agreement whereby anyone earning less than €65,000 “received no cut in actual pay”.

Mary Lou wanted to know how he was going to prioritise the needs of lower paid workers in the current round of pay talks.

Brendan gave a lovely, long, Brendan Howlin answer, reiterating his commitment (as son of a trade union official) to looking out for lower paid workers.

“The difficulty with the Minister’s reply is that it is just jabber,” sniffed Mary Lou.

Of course, not all the fat pensions go to politicians. “Obviously, there are many in the public sphere in receipt of analogous pensions,” pointed out the minister, mentioning the likes senior judges, academics and administrators.

A good pension package is important when trying to attract “quality people” to the public service. “When recovery comes” and there are “much more lucrative opportunities in the private sphere” there will be “pressures associated” with filling senior positions.

Mary Lou was there in a flash.

“I’m sure you’re not asserting that, if we want quality people working throughout the system, the only place there is a need for what you call ‘quality’ is at the top of the tree.”

Quality Street – not made for sharing . . .