Every May 21st since Jastine Valdez was abducted in Enniskerry, Co Wicklow, and murdered shortly afterwards, nearly four years ago, her parents, Thessie and Danilo, have prepared a meal of her favourite food.
The meal is served to her friends and to some of those who have supported the Filipino family since the tragedy that engulfed them. Every year, they set a place for her at the table.
Every night since she was murdered in 2018 the couple say goodnight to her bed that is still made up in the way it was when she last left her home.
“Whenever we were feeling down, Jastine would always tell us that whatever problem we have, we will get through it because God will always be there for us. She said what matters is we are healthy and no one causes us any harm,” says her mother, Teresita, better known as Thessie.
“We will never forget one particular conversation we had, when we hoped and dreamed about our future. She promised us that when she finishes college and finds a stable job, Danny and I could then stop working, we could relax and travel on a business-class flight at that.
‘Chatting and laughing’
“She then touched and patted our backs gently, assuring us that we will be okay. Then we continued chatting and laughing. We always kept things light and happy because being together was enough for us.”
Ms Valdez, a 24-year-old business administration graduate of Portobello Institute, was abducted and later killed by Mark Hennessy (40) shortly after getting off a bus in Enniskerry, Co Wicklow, at about 6.15pm on May 19th, 2018. Her body was found two days later in Rathmichael, Co Dublin. Hennessy was shot dead by gardaí as they moved to arrest him.
Other families have grieved since, including the family of Ashling Murphy, who was killed in Tullamore, Co Offaly in early January during an afternoon run.
“When I heard about it, I could not breathe and I felt a really deep pain in my heart. I thought of my daughter right away. I don’t know what to say to them because until now we still have not recovered from the pain.
‘Heartfelt condolences’
“To be honest, we are still grieving and we think of Jastine all the time. So I cannot see how can we encourage Ashling’s parents that life must go on when we ourselves have not and can never move on.”
Nevertheless, the couple offered “our heartfelt condolences” to the Murphy family: “We hope the support from your loved ones bring you peace during this difficult time. We want you to know that although the grief never fully goes away, [it] just takes a different shape. You do learn to cope with it and carry on over time. Some day you will learn to find comfort from the great moments that you were able to have with her before she was taken too soon,” says Thessie.
Each day for the Filipino couple remains a struggle, with Thessie posting stories about her daughter on Facebook to keep her memory alive, and endlessly reviewing the copious photographs of happier days.
Nearly four years on, she still has the blouse her daughter wore the night before she was killed. She has never washed it. “I cling to it tightly all the time as I smell the beautiful Chloe perfume scent she left.”