I don’t remember the first time I wore tights, but I do remember the first time they were a subject of annoyance for a woman in my life. Well, I say woman, but, in fact, we were six-year-olds in first class. It was discovered in the cloakroom that my classmate Mary wore her knickers over her tights and as a result the girls decided it was best if we kept our distance from her because she was “weird”.
I’ve thought of poor Mary many times over the years, as my own relationship with tights developed. Mary was not weird, she was just ahead of her time. She (or her mother) knew the perils of fally-downy tights, and had taken the necessary steps to combat them. For this, she was ostracised, and unfortunately, I can say with confidence that this was not the last time tights presented her with difficulty.
Unless you are one of the brave, brave women, who forgo tights year-round, or someone who simply always wears trousers, you too are familiar with the challenges posed by them. There are the aforementioned fally-downy ones, insidious in their very existence, because you cannot identify them until you have worn them for a bit. Many a woman has cursed her luck while half-walking half-waddling to the bus stop as her tights attempt to flee from her gusset to her ankles. She will promise to herself that they are going right in the bin as she makes her way to the toilet to pull them up for the fifth time around eleven am. Alas, she will forget all about this vow when she tears them off with relief around six flinging them into the wash basket instead and beginning the cycle once again.
Teeny tiny hole
There are the tights with a teeny tiny hole in the toe, which seems manageable as you put them on the morning but grows as you wear them eventually acting as a tourniquet for your toe causing you to wonder if you will actually lose it and what effect that will have on your balance and ability to wear open-toed shoes and sandals.
Tights without enough stretch will dig into you at the waistband, making the post-lunchtime period uncomfortable and your dress look ill-fitting. Tights you thought were matte but are in fact shiny will make you look less Alexa Chung and more Tonya Harding. Tights which have laddered will make you look less professional and capable and more a slovenly mess. Tights are an absolute nightmare, but they don’t have to be anymore.
The founders of Heist Tights identified the fact that tights simply were not working for the people who wore them, and worked with sixty-seven women to identify the problems existing pairs presented. The result is a range of tights which come in several colours and in sizes four to twenty-four. There are several thicknesses available and a choice of two waistbands (high and low). They are a revelation.
The designers looked at sportswear to identify what made the waistbands of high-end exercise leggings comfortable and translated that to tights, resulting in a waistband which hugs the body rather than digging in or rolling down. The material has increased levels of nylon, which means they are incredibly stretchy and don’t bobble or tear (as long as you treat them with care). They are virtually seamless, and the one seam that does exist is tucked under the foot, solving the tourniquet toe problem mentioned above.
Of course, Heist tights are more costly than a standard pair, at €32, with free shipping if you buy three or more pairs. And I will still sometimes wear my old reliables from Penney's or M&S. (My more sophisticated friends swear by their trusty Wolford tights which can last years I'm told). But this new product brings us one step closer to the end of tights tyranny. Now, if only someone could do the same for bras.
