"Despite all of the positives, there remains a bigger, fundamental problem, which is: Why do I still feel like s**t?" says Martha Wainwright from a whitewashed corner of Ursa, her Montreal-based cafe and music venue.
It is a perfectly reasonable question. Wainwright weighs up the pros and cons. There are layers of change the world is going through, she posits. She has fared relatively well, she is quick to add. Living in Montreal throughout Covid-19, she has experienced a time of being able to go about her life in a more flexible way. “I was able to live-stream some gigs from Ursa, and last summer I was able to do some shows outside, with real people in attendance. I have partners in my life, I have children, and my kids were able to go to school. I made the new record and I finished a book. On a large scale, it was a productive year for me, but … ”
She looks away and then asks herself a question. “Am I deeply affected? As we know, it’s going to be a long process of coming out of Covid, and in the doing of that I think many people will be changed from how we react to and greet people – from touching, hugging, mask-wearing and so on. I haven’t seen my family, my brother, my dad, for some time, so the whole thing seems to be a new definition of who we are, a defining part of our lives, a real before-and-after story.”
Wainwright has her own before and after story, too, of course. As part of a cherished musical family, she has had to fight her way through a raft of applause and accomplishments for her parents and brother, and to claim a clear space for herself. Her self-titled debut album arrived in 2005 when she was 29, late enough for any songwriter but perhaps just the right time for a person whose first official record included a song titled Bloody Mother F**king Asshole, which is about her father. Over the past 15 years, Wainwright’s intermittent conflict with her family has been resolved somewhat, but her forthcoming album, Love Will Be Reborn, tells another before-and-after tale: her recent divorce from musician and producer Brad Albetta, the custody battle over their two children, Arcangelo and Francis, and a cautious way back into finding love. When I ask her were the new songs difficult to write, there are stops and starts in her voice as if she’s evaluating what and how much to say.
“Some of the songs certainly were difficult to write – the ones that were more in reference to some deeper fears and concerns relating to my difficult family rupture and time of insecurity,” she says. “So, yes, a lot of fear. I would sit down and write a verse, find it painful to continue because it was too dark, and I’d have to put the guitar down. Then I’d return to it and try and find a way to say what I wanted to say without, er, getting arrested, without hurting my children, without being too close-minded.”
Parental guidance
Did it bother her that as a songwriter noted for confessional, sometimes acidic honesty she had to rein in on certain topics? Writing a song in your 20s is different from when you’re in your 40s, she advises. “I’m still someone who is young at heart and who hasn’t changed that much, but when you take on certain responsibilities – in my case not just to myself but also to my two young children – and write songs that relate to their dad, you have to be careful.”
We circle back to the pandemic and the restrictions that are loosening with the global rollout of vaccines. You might think she cannot wait to pack her bags and tour the world again for months at a stretch, but that won’t be possible for some time. In two words? Parental responsibilities.
“Everyone has difficult things in their lives they have to grapple with and not bore other people with, or harass other people with, but I can give you a window to a part of what relates to me and my music, and that is I can’t tour now as much as I would like or have done, and not just because of Covid. I share custody of my kids, so going away or saying yes to a great gig in some far-off place is now tied to a schedule that I can’t switch easily because it’s conflicting. What that means on a practical level is there is a whole other layer that stops me from doing what I want to do the most, and that will support me and my children.”
She misses performing terribly, she says, but is now able to do some shows directly outside her cafe. “Even if there are 20, 30 or 40 people here, the gigs are as precious as can be. The other thing is that I’m 45, I’m deep in middle age and I’m going through an adjustment period – as we all are.”
Happier times
Wainwright talks about the album’s title track, perhaps eager to deviate from what might be construed as an air of melancholy. “I hope the adjustment period will follow the theme of the new album. The song itself arrived surprisingly quickly and helped me to believe that good would come from bad. It also taught me about the positivity of rebirth and all its facets. The song actually came true, which is amazing.”
Here’s another story for you: if before was the depths of despair, then after is unbridled joy. She is smiling widely now, and with good reason. “After almost two years of being in court and lonely – for my children, especially – and being afraid of the future, afraid of everything, it was a huge surprise to me that I met somebody who was really wonderful, nice and kind. I guess it happens but I didn’t think it was going to. Of course, anybody would want it to happen, but it was a complete surprise and more than romantic. It was a solid partnership that I realised could go on because I felt stabilised by it.”
It’s a warm ending to a cold chapter in her life, she admits, but Martha Wainwright isn’t the rose-tinted-glasses type. “I don’t want to say that everything in life – my happiness, my ability to survive – is dependent on the love of a man, but love sure can help. A lot. If it’s good and true and strong, then I’ll take it.”
Love Will Be Reborn, by Martha Wainwright, is released August 20th via Pheromone Records/Cooking Vinyl
MEET THE FAMILY
Mother: Kate McGarrigle
From an early age, Kate, the daughter of Irish pianist Francis McGarrigle, absorbed a wide range of music that embraced French-Canadian folk songs, bluegrass, pop. She died in January 2010. In her memory, her close friend Emmylou Harris wrote Darlin' Kate, a track on her 2011 album, Hard Bargain.
Father: Loudon Wainwright III
Loudon started his career in the early 1970s and has made a notable career out of writing insightful, honest and extremely witty songs. In 1999, on considering his career, he said that his back catalogue (which at that time numbered 15 albums) could be regarded by some as "checkered, although I prefer to think of it as a tapestry".
Brother: Rufus Wainwright
Rufus released his self-titled debut album in 1998 and has continued with a successful career that has spanned not just his signature style of baroque pop but also opera. His 10th studio album, Unfollow the Rules, was released in 2020 and was nominated for a Grammy Award in the best traditional pop album category.
Half-sister: Lucy Wainwright Roche
Lucy, the daughter of Loudon and Suzzy Roche, released her debut album in 2010. She has regularly toured with her father and Rufus, and in 2015 collaborated with Martha on the album Songs in the Dark (credited to The Wainwright Sisters), which included childhood lullabies their respective mothers sang to them.
