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‘I am in fear now’: Daughter who alleged father kicked in locked bedroom door gets protection order

Another woman tells family court husband forces her to perform sexual acts and tells her she is ‘evil’

More than 20 applicants came before the court in Dolphin House, central Dublin, on Friday. Photograph: Stephen Collins/Collins
More than 20 applicants came before the court in Dolphin House, central Dublin, on Friday. Photograph: Stephen Collins/Collins

A daughter who alleged her father kicked in her locked bedroom door and “smashed everything” in her bedroom has secured a protection order against him.

Her father, who had been drinking, jumped on a TV in his bare feet and when she fled to the bathroom and locked herself in, he kicked that door in too and broke the lock, she told Dublin District Family Court.

She phoned her brother who begged her father over the phone loudspeaker to stop but he did not and she fled to her sister’s home, she said.

“I just am in fear now, it has escalated so much, I don’t know what’s next,” the woman, aged in her 30s, said, adding it was just her and her father in the family home.

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Judge Cephas Power granted her a protection order, returnable to December.

Another woman who alleged her husband forces her to perform sexual acts on him, subjects her to constant emotional abuse and screams and shouts at her also secured a protection order. “He says I am evil and must be punished,” she said.

She said he watched porn and lay on a bed and ordered her to perform sexual acts on him but did not touch her or even hold her hand.

She got a protection order about two years ago after he hit her in the face and split her lip, but he forced her to go back into court and have it discharged, the woman said.

Since then, he had not subjected her to physical violence but there was constant emotional abuse and she intends to separate. “I am so tired, I do not want this relationship any more.”

Both women were among more than 20 applicants who came before the court in Dolphin House, central Dublin, on Friday. Most were seeking protection or other orders ex parte (one side only represented) under the Domestic Violence Act.

A tearful woman told the judge she agreed to let her ex-husband move back into her home after their divorce because he had nowhere to go. “I did not want to see him on the streets.”

She was concerned after learning the man slept naked in a bedroom with her son, aged in his early 20s. Her son told her that her ex-husband, aged in his 60s, watched porn and sometimes fell asleep with a sex toy on his penis.

In tears, she told the judge she had made “a big mistake” permitting him back into her home and wanted an emergency barring order.

The judge said the evidence did not meet the threshold for that order – which requires an immediate risk to safety – but she could apply for a barring order in December or return to court before then if necessary.

In a separate application, a mother who previously got an interim barring order against her adult son secured a two-year full barring order. She told the judge, while waiting outside court for the case to be called, she had had a panic attack out of concern he would turn up.

His behaviour was “erratic” due to his cocaine use and she was estranged from him for four years. He came to her house recently following a “miscommunication” over who was collecting his child and caused “a big melee” during which she was knocked to the ground. He sends her “horrible” text messages and has threatened to come to her house weekly, she said. She could not deal with this behaviour and did not want her grandchildren witnessing it.

“I want a barring order, I don’t want him arrested, he is my son, but I’m afraid.”

In another case, a man who alleged his wife had been violent towards him, including slapping him in the face, secured a protection order. His wife had an anger disorder and addiction issues, he said.

The judge also granted an application by a woman to issue a summons against her ex-partner over almost €40,000 in alleged unpaid child maintenance and expenses.

Mary Carolan

Mary Carolan

Mary Carolan is the Legal Affairs Correspondent of the Irish Times