Life has few certainties, but one thing we can be sure of is we will all have to deal with death eventually.

In what it describes as a conservative estimate, the Irish Hospice Foundation says at least one in 10 of the Irish workforce is directly affected by bereavement annually. Yet little legislation or guidance is in place for dealing with grief in the workplace.

We all deal with grief differently, but at a minimum we need time out and support when trying to cope with the death of a loved one. However, there is no legal entitlement to statutory leave following a bereavement, and few employers have detailed policies in place to help those who are dealing with grief.

As a result, someone trying to cope with an unexpected loss may have little or no idea of their rights. Many of those who experience bereavement can come to feel as though they are not dealt with as compassionately as they could have been by employers

Part of the problem is death remains something of a taboo subject, both in and out of work.

This is despite the fact 30,000 people die in Ireland each year, according to the Central Statistics Office. The Hospice Foundation estimates as many as 198,300 workers are currently experiencing grief.

Handled badly

A report carried out by the foundation in 2006 showed few companies had policies for helping staff who experience the death of a loved one. The organisation’s bereavement services training and development manager, Breffni McGuinness, said things had improved somewhat since that research was carried out, but many Irish firms still lack proper policies.

“What we have found is that there are pockets of good practice, with some workplaces being very keyed in and responding well to their employees around the issue. However there are obviously organisations where people are not as aware and where bereavement can be handled very badly,” he said.

In this, Irish companies are not alone. Research carried out by the National Council for Palliative Care in the UK, in 2014, showed a third of employees who had suffered bereavement in the previous five years felt they had not been treated with compassion by their employer.

More than half of all those surveyed said they would consider leaving their job if their employer did not provide proper support if someone close to them died.

In addition, the research discovered considerable public backing for bereavement support in the workplace, with more than four in five people agreeing all employers should have a compassionate employment policy, including paid bereavement leave, flexible working and a range of other support.

According to McGuinness, the issue has become of greater interest in recent years , particularly in Britain on the back of the experience of high-profile individuals such as business journalist Robert Peston, who recently left the BBC to become political editor at ITV.

Proper policies

Peston wrote movingly on his experience of grief in the workplace and how the BBC offered a good deal of flexibility when his wife died and he was left bringing up two young children. His comments struck a deep chord with the British public, said McGuinness, and resulted in a greater push for the introduction of proper policies by employers.

He also highlighted the case of Lucy Herd, whose distress after her 23-month-old son drowned, in August 2010, was amplified when she discovered her husband was allowed only three days' paid leave, of which one had to be for the funeral.

Herd has since set up a charity (Jack’s Rainbow) and led a campaign to ensure a statutory length of bereavement leave. Last year she linked with Acas (Advisory, Conciliation and Arbitration Service) to help develop new guidance on the issue for employers in the UK.

"When I started on this, grief and bereavement were not subjects that were widely discussed, and I do think that in the intervening years that companies have got better about it," she told The Irish Times. "But some employers are still a nightmare, with little understanding or compassion, and where it is unfortunately all about the money.

“Introducing a policy around bereavement is a really good starting place for companies, not least because it gets employers to think about bereavement properly and how we’re not all robots. It also encourages employees to talk about the issue, and that in itself is healing,” Herd added.

In Ireland, a statutory entitlement to force majeure leave allows an employee to take up to three days' paid leave from work a year due to an urgent family crisis. But this doesn't cover the death of a loved one, although employers typically grant time in such situations under the force majeure provision.

Legislation

Sinn Féin TD Peadar Tóibín recently introduced legislation that would provide for paid bereavement leave for employees, reflecting existing practices by public and private employers. The Bill, which has trade union backing, has passed the first stage in the Dáil, although Tóibín admits he doesn’t know how much crossparty support it will receive.

“The vast majority of employers provide some type of bereavement leave and usually take force majeure as a template, so the legislation is really just to ensure there are no gray areas, so that a person in grief knows their rights at what is obviously a difficult moment for them,” he said.

“Currently there’s a gap within employer/employee regulations and it means an uneven delivery of what should be a basic right, which is a concern, particularly in sectors where employment may be temporary or contract,” he said. “My legislation seeks to clarify the issues and in doing so should make things easier for both workers and organisations alike.”

Unlike Herd, who believes paid bereavement leave should be spread so employees could take it when they wanted, for example, using most days around the funeral but possibly keeping some spare in case of needing to attend inquests, deal with a will or even just take a day out, Tóibín is unsure of whether this is required.

Effective responses

Nonetheless, McGuinness said Tóibín’s legislation is an important first step in raising awareness at a national and Governmental level about supporting workers who are bereaved. However, he said it was just one in what needs to be a series of effective responses for employees.

The Irish Hospice Foundation believes there should also be a statutory requirement for every employer to have a bereavement policy that outlines not just leave entitlements but details of ongoing supports and response protocols.

Mr McGuinness said a number of organisations in Ireland have led the way in developing such policies and these have had a beneficial effect for bereaved workers and the organisations as well.

“Organisations need to see that the workplace can be a really positive environment for people who have been bereaved, and that some individuals take comfort in being able to work when their work has been turned upside down. Given this, it is important that they offer flexibility and keep checking in with employees to see what works best for them. It’s all about ensuring that staff are supported and realising that grief can take a long time to work through,” he said.

Embarrassment

Employers aren’t the only ones who have a role to play in helping those who are experiencing a bereavement. Often our embarrassment about discussing the issue can lead those who have suffered a loss to feel isolated. The difficulties in talking about grief openly at work can also be further complicated when the person that dies is not only someone’s family member or friend but also a colleague.

“There’s no doubting that bereavement is an awkward topic, but we should be careful about ensuring the awkwardness doesn’t stop us from doing good things for those who need our support. Those who have lost someone don’t necessarily need to be wrapped in cotton wool, and there is great solidarity in recognising that someone is going through a difficult time but may still be able to make a valuable contribution,” said McGuinness.

His views are echoed by Melrona Kirrane, an organisational psychologist at DCU Business School, who said those who lose someone want that loss acknowledged.

“The main thing that people need when they are bereaved is social support. People often don’t know what to say in these situations but just acknowledging it is very simple and powerful. Whether it’s employer or employee, talking about death and marking the fact that someone may be experiencing grief goes a long way to helping someone get through,” she said.