AGAINST THE ODDS:DEPENDING ON your persuasion, Vinny Fitzpatrick was either as happy as Larry, happy as a sand boy or as happy as a pig up to its oxters in slop.

Not that you’d have guessed it from his lugubrious expression, one which often prompted strangers to ask if he was feeling unwell.

Yet behind the Buster Keaton veneer, Vinny’s over-worked heart fluttered, his pudgy fingers and toes tingled, and his capacious gullet rumbled in anticipation of a feed of pints.

For the middle-aged Dublin bus driver, the twin vices of gambling and Guinness were never celebrated with greater enthusiasm than when the two tectonic plates of sport, the Grand National and The Masters, collided on the same week.

For Vinny it was an excuse to surf a tsunami of stout and scrawl hieroglyphics on countless betting slips, even more so after the serious health issues which made him a non-runner on the double last year.

As he pottered into Boru Betting on his lunch break on Tuesday to place a few bets, Vinny contemplated what made the Aintree-Augusta axis so special.

The fact the Aintree action was unsaddling on Thursday, Friday and Saturday just as Augusta teed off was a unique selling point, as it meant you didn’t miss one minute of sporting combat either side of the Atlantic. But there was more.

The sporting venues were constant, the challenges presented unique, and the contestants, who rolled up each year, were like old family friends dropping in to say hello over a mint julep or a pint of John Smith’s bitter.

Just as Augusta showcased the golfing talents of Phil, Tiger, Ernie and Pádraig so Aintree paraded the outstanding horsemanship of AP, Ruby, Timmy and Barry.

Then, there were the props which made the two theatres so special. At Augusta, there was Rae’s Creek, the Eisenhower Tree and Butler’s Cabin – a horse of the same name was an unlucky National loser in 2006 – while Aintree’s fences were equally renowned by their monikers, Becher’s Brook, Valentine’s and The Chair.

If Amen Corner was a make-or-break for golfers chasing the famed Green Jacket, then The Elbow at Aintree’s 494-yard run-in – longer than the 18th at Augusta – was so often a cradle of broken National dreams.

Just as Augusta had Magnolia Lane and its respectable patrons, Aintree had the Melling Road and its rambunctious punters.

With Aintree and Augusta link-ups flooding his little grey cells, by the time he grabbed a fistful of dockets, shiny red pencil and took his usual perch in Boru Betting, Vinny wasn’t sure whether to back Vic Venturi for the Masters or Lion Kim for the National.

In the event, he did neither.

This was a time for quiet contemplation, and a methodical approach to seeking a return on his investment.

First up were the azaleas of Augusta. As always Vinny applied his own rules. For starters, Augusta rookies were ruled out as none had won since Fuzzy Zoeller in 1979 and he benefited from a collapse by Ed Sneed.

Experience of the tournament, shot-making skills and a svelte putting touch were vital, especially now the course was set up for birdies, unlike 2007 to 2009 when Zach Johnson, Trevor Immelman and Angel Cabrera gouged out Green Jackets against a backdrop of narrow fairways, rough and the sound of silence.

All three were available this week at odds of more than 100 to 1 but they didn’t figure on Vinny’s radar. Another winner did, Phil Mickelson, fresh from capturing the Houston Open last Sunday.

Leftie loved Augusta, where he was a three-time winner, and if the odds of 13 to 2 seemed skinny, the fact Boylesports and Paddy Power were offering each-way for a top six place made Vinny quite sanguine about his €20 each-way investment.

Applying his horses for courses theory, Vinny also had a tenner each-way on Anthony Kim (40 to 1) and KJ Choi (66 to 1), who both finished in the top four last year and had solid recent form on the US Tour.

That Tiger Woods was 12 to 1 seemed staggering given his record at Augusta but “El Tigre” had lost his bite since blowing his marriage and Vinny was unsure if he’d ever overhaul Jack Nicklaus’ record of 18 Majors now.

Pádraig Harrington had hardly won an egg cup since the summer of 2008 but a top 10 finish in Texas last weekend encouraged Vinny to have a fiver each-way on the dogged Dubliner to be top European at 14 to 1 – his record at Augusta was better than middling as the course forgave errant driving, Harrington’s weak spot.

More bets would follow on Saturday morning when the picture became clearer at Augusta but now it was time for Vinny to focus on the National, another sporting event that bit easier to predict than before.

Now, the drops from fences were less severe, the ground watered to make it safer and the better horses encouraged to run by the handicapper who gave them less weight than before. It was no longer a betting lottery.

Vinny abided by his own homegrown Grand National rules, the first was never back a horse carrying more than 11 stone – only two, Hedgehunter (2005) and Don’t Push It (2010) had won since 1983. This year, that ruled out a quarter of the field.

In addition, he ignored horses aged seven or 13, as either too young or too old, which put the kybosh on Quinz and Hello Bud. No grey had won since 1961, which leaned him away from Silver By Nature.

Knowledge of Aintree was vital, both in the saddle and under it, which was why he was backing Ruby Walsh and The Midnight Club, trained by Willie Mullins.

Walsh had won the race twice and been placed three times. He was the best jockey in the business and was riding for an astute trainer, who saddled Hedgehunter to run with distinction five years in a row. At 9 to 1, The Midnight Club, carrying 10st 13lb, looked an ideal fit to shoulder Vinny’s €20 each-way.

With Irish-trained horses laid out especially for the race, Vinny expected Backstage, Oscar Time and Bluesea Cracker to run well.

Looking for value, he spied a 25 to 1 shot, State Of Play, twice placed in the race and with a handy 10 stone 6lb on his back. In Compliance, trained by Dessie Hughes was also off a featherweight and over-priced at 50/1.

With that, Vinny invested two more tenners each-way. The sporting die was cast.

As he contemplated his favourite sporting weekend of the year – Everton were live on the telly on Saturday lunch-time for good measure – he thought of an old Shakespeare line, “My crown is called content, a crown that kings seldom enjoy”. Little did he know what was lurking around his own Canal Turn.

Vinny's Bismarck

1pt Lay Tiger Woods – US Masters (12/1, liability 12pts)

Bets of the Week

2pts each-way Phil Mickelson – US Masters (13/2, Boylesports)

2pts each-way The Midnight Club – Aintree Grand National (Starting price)