So who needs Ronaldo? Rather sensibly, before yesterday's game Bobby Robson said Newcastle United required another 40 points merely to ensure they are hosting Premiership football here next season. But if Alan Shearer keeps scoring at this rate they could soon be as high as mid-table mediocrity, Shearer having now scored 10 times in his last four games.
However, rather amazingly, Robson also said before yesterday's game that he had tried to sign Ronaldo on loan from Internazionale last week. Robson did manage the Brazilian at PSV Eindhoven and Barcelona, but rather predictably his effort failed. He got Kevin Gallacher instead.
At least it worked. Gallacher made his debut in a one-time Blackburn partnership with Shearer, and left Shearer so at ease he had scored his 10th and 11th goals of the season before halftime.
Middlesbrough were desperate by then, severely destabilised by the ninth-minute injury to Gary Pallister. Sandwiched between Shearer and Mark Schwarzer, Pallister was taken to hospital unconscious but Bryan Robson said afterwards that a scan had revealed no serious damage.
An ankle knock to Juninho that necessitated his removal at halftime completed a miserable afternoon for Middlesbrough. They have lost five of their last six league games and their fans must hope their side has got its traditional post-Christmas freefall in early.
Considering this was a TyneTees derby, Middlesbrough's lack of bite was alarming. "I don't think we competed all over the park," said Robson the younger. "We decided to play well in the second half but the game was all over by then. Newcastle out-ran and out-fought us."
Indeed they did. With Robert Lee directing traffic and Kieron Dyer swerving in front of him unpredictably, Middlesbrough's midfield was running backwards from the off leaving the defence exposed. It took only 13 minutes and one persevering run and cross from Warren Barton for Newcastle to edge ahead. Shearer rose above Pallister's replacement Steve Vickers and Schwarzer was given no chance.
Schwarzer then made the first of a series of impressive saves - from a volley by Shearer - but the contest ended a minute before half-time when Shearer jumped in familiar fashion, this time holding off Gianluca Festa to power in a Nolberto Solano centre. It was a marvellous finish and again Schwarzer was blameless.
Perhaps invigorated by a blistering half-time team talk, Middlesbrough began the second half brighter but it was not until the 89th minute that Brian Deane delivered Middlesbrough's undeserved and somewhat dodgy consolation goal. Christian Ziege's free-kick was met unconvincingly by Alain Goma, the ball hit Deane's left arm and allowed him to belt it in from six yards.
NEWCASTLE: Harper, Barton, Dabizas, Goma, Domi, Dyer, Lee, Speed, Solano (Glass 88), Shearer, Gallacher (Robinson 83). Subs Not Used: Marcelino, Hughes, Karelse. Booked: Dabizas, Goma. Goals: Shearer 17, 44.
MIDDLESBROUGH: Schwarzer, Fleming, Festa, Pallister (Vickers 9), Cooper, Ziege, Mustoe, Ince, O'Neill, Deane, Juninho (Campbell 45). Subs Not Used: Armstrong, Summerbell, Roberts. Booked: Cooper, Festa, Fleming. Goals: Deane 89.
Referee: S Lodge (Barnsley).