Day 13. Michael Owen equalises . . . cue Kevin Keegan: "When a game goes like this, Brian, there's only one team that'll win it and that's England . . . I hope I'm not tempting providence." More of that anon.
Day 13 proved to be a bit unlucky for BBC reporter Rob Newman, who was sent to Toulouse to report on the pre-match riots. Except there were none. Morning news. "Any sign of trouble there Rob?" "No Martyn, none." Lunchtime. "Any problems there Rob?" "No Peter, all's quiet." Evening news. "Still quiet Rob?" "YES, Michael." ("But ask me once more and I'll start a bloody riot myself," screamed the bored expression on his face).
Meanwhile Sky News were going over live to Toulouse every minute (on the minute) just on the off chance that they'd spot a bit of `bovver'. All they got were pictures of England fans swapping scarves and banter with Romanians and children having their faces painted with the colours of both countries. "We'll go back to Toulouse shortly," promised Bob Friend - "and we'll try to find you a riot," we half expected him to say.
Perhaps one of the reasons all was quiet in Toulouse was because Ray Rafferty and three of his mates were back in England. The four were recognised by English spotter police teams in Toulouse and were deported to Heathrow Airport yesterday morning.
A gutted Ray spoke to the world's media when he came through the arrivals' gate. "I didn't do nuffin'," he insisted. "You seem quite upset," said the perceptive Sky reporter. "What do you expect when you haven't done nuffin' and you get deported," he said, close to tears. "Were you planning on starting trouble?" asked the BBC. Ray hesitated and sported a `do you fink I'm so fick I'd say yes?' mien. "Nobody plans to start trouble," he said. (Guess it's just something that happens?). So perhaps Ray was just an innocent football fan and had been a victim of a gross miscarriage of justice. "Have you any convictions Ray?" asked the BBC as Ray headed for the exit. "Just the one," he said, "What for?" "Eh, it's football related," he revealed. Mmmm.
Colombia v Tunisia. Wonderful, kamikaze stuff. The highlight? When John Motson's voice was nearly drowned out by a Colombian television commentator when Preciado scored the winner. "Goal," said a restrained Motty. "Gol, gol, gol, go, go, go, goooooooool," screamed his rowdy neighbour. England v Romania. Bobby Robson didn't make it to the ITV studio at the ground. (Exclusive: "Where do I go today," Bobby asked the ITV producer yesterday morning. "Toulouse Bobby," he was told. So Bobby ended up in the small fishing village of Louse in western France, hence the need for an outside broadcast unit to link him up with the rest of the ITV panel). Forty-seventh minute. Romania scored via Coventry City's Viorel Moldovan. Ever notice when England concede a goal Brian Moore adopts the voice of a commentator at a state funeral? Couldn't help think of Ron Atkinson's comments on World Cup Encore the night before.
"I think England will beat them easy. I think Romania may have peaked in the qualifying rounds. I saw them play Colombia last week and they were ordinary, very ordinary. A lot of their better players are ageing, there's no energy in the side, they've only one or two half-decent players."
(The curious thing about Big Ron, and many of his fellow expert panellists across the water, is that he thinks most of England's opponents are rubbish but still believes they're world beaters when they beat them. Could never figure that one out.)
Eighty-fourth minute, Michael Owen equalised. Maybe Big Ron was right? Then Kev dangled a carrot in front of the nose of providence (aka Dan Petrescu) and, well, it just couldn't resist, could it? "It's a little mini-disaster," insisted Bobby, speaking live from Louse. "Now, how do I get out of here?" Next stop for Bobby is Lens, venue for England v Colombia. Bet he's ends up in Toulens, suburb of Guadalajara in Mexico.
