"What's it like to be outclassed?" is one of the Manchester United supporters' favoured taunts, regularly thrown in the direction of opposing teams.
If they were never quite sure what the experience felt like themselves Juventus gave them an unwelcome tutorial on the subject in much of Wednesday night's game at Old Trafford. Either the Old Lady of Turin has had hormone replacement therapy recently or else those who told us she was a spent force were talking through their bottoms. Or maybe the standard of the English Premiership isn't quite as lofty as Sky Sports and much of the media keep telling us. But then only those of us who are surprised by this are the fools. (Guilty as charged).
As great sporting miscarriages of justice go, Ryan Giggs's 92nd minute equaliser was up there with the "draw" in the Holyfield v Lewis fight. Sheer heart, though, one quality an Alex Ferguson side will never lack, threw them a lifeline but you have to wonder whether Juventus showed just a tad too much respect for their hosts? Why else did they content themselves with a one-goal lead when they looked comfortably capable of killing off the tie, even before the second leg gets underway in Turin? But, even though they somehow managed a draw, for United fans, who were beginning to believe this might be their year in Europe, Wednesday was horribly depressing and only the provocation of smirking work colleagues on Thursday morning had them declaring: "We'll stuff 'em in Turin." Juventus will have to have one hell of an off day on Wednesday week if the same United fans are going to be Barcelona bound on May 26th.
It was depressing too for Brazilian supporters. Why? Well, presumably the game was shown in Brazil and, if it was, one suspects football followers there were very nearly as alarmed by United's first-half humiliation as United were themselves.
Only last week Brazil's new coach, Wanderley Luxemburgo, was waxing lyrical about this United team, claiming that he and his players could learn a thing or two from them. Barely recovered from the trauma of losing last year's World Cup final Brazilians would probably prefer if their coach spent a little more time studying the Italians' qualities, rather than those of the team they just humbled. "I especially like United's tactics and movement," said Luxemburgo. Before Wednesday, of course.
Tactics? Half the team trying (and failing) to mark Zidane, leaving Davids, Deschamps and Di Livio room to roam and space to inflict collateral damage? Movement? Yes, that was impressive too, especially if frantic shadow-chasing is your thing. Once United finally realised that the route through the middle was well and truly blocked they had a go at playing it down the wings, but the Juventus full backs simply forced Beckham onto his left foot (which doesn't work) and Giggs onto his right (doesn't work either) and voila, United's threat was annulled. Meanwhile, Cole and Yorke were so tightly marked that they might as well have taken a seat in the stand to admire their opponents. Paul Scholes went AWOL, leaving Keane to mark Zidane, Davids and Deschamps - a tricky task, that.
"The Red ones try to impose a high rhythm, but the Juve pressed in every zone of the field and the ideas of English do not seem much clear. Above all they do not succeed to play on the wings and their action is slow and expectable." Admittedly my internet translator needs to polish up on its English a bit but you get the gist of its translation of Italian newspaper Gazzetta dello Sport's account of the game.
For "expectable" read "predictable"; for "predictable" read "Manchester United in Europe"; for "Manchester United in Europe" read "bereft of ideas once the game-plan doesn't work". And for that read "how come Beckham, Giggs and Scholes looked out of their depth on Wednesday when they look positively God-like against Sheffield Wednesday and Charlton Athletic?".
And there's the rub. Yes, Alex Ferguson deserves praise for nurturing homegrown talent, such as Beckham, Giggs, Scholes, Nicky Butt and the Neville brothers, but while they are more than effective in English domestic football and against weaker European opposition, against the sophistication of players of the quality that Juventus possess they just look plain ordinary - tactically, technically and creatively. You begin to doubt whether Ferguson will ever fulfil his European dream with a team dominated by British players. After all it took the introduction of Eric Cantona who, love him or loathe him, brought a bit of desperately-needed imagination to the United attack, to transform the team from nearly men to the force they became in English football. Maybe a bit of continental flair is needed again (in place of Scholes and Cole) to pep up the European challenge.
The current attack is made up of players who learnt their football the English way - Cole, Giggs, Beckham and Yorke (yes, he began his footballing education in Trinidad and Tobago, but he graduated at Aston Villa). Yorke has had a stunning season in England and was even being touted as European Footballer Of The Year, but compare his contribution in Wednesday's game, when he was eventually replaced by Teddy Sheringham, with that of a half-fit Zinedine Zidane.
Ironically Cantona advised Ferguson to buy Zidane when he was still at Bordeaux, but the United manager wasn't convinced and his hesitation (or perhaps his chairman's reluctance to provide the finance for the deal) proved costly - Zidane was signed by Juventus in May 1996. Word has it that Zidane will be leaving Juventus this summer because his wife wants to live by the sea - Barcelona are favourites to sign him. But, Madame Zidane, they say the Manchester Ship Canal's lovely in the summer. Ducks and all. Give it a try. Manchester (United) needs your husband.
