DÁIL SKETCH: Despite what Cowen says, it's hard to close all loopholes against our business dynamos

THE THING about your average rotten-with-money business visionary, entrepreneurial dynamo, horse fancier and natty dresser, is that you can’t keep him down.

He may suffer setbacks, but he will always pick himself up and get back in the game, immaculately coiffed. That’s the nature of the beast. It’s what people expect of their living legends.

Even when times are very bad, there is always something new to “get into” before the amateurs cotton on.

Acolytes look to them for guidance, living for that moment when, once again, they can boast to the plodders while lighting up a fat cigar: “Seánie (or some such macho pet name) put me onto it. Great guy. Very bright.”

Could it really be the end for them now? Are they really finished? Certainly, the Government is of the opinion that these expensively watered Sages of Shanahan’s have sealed their last deal over the 24oz rib-eye. Their breed has been wiped out by the exploding property bubble. They won’t bother us – the taxpayer – again.

At least that’s what Brian Cowen says, and he’s the Taoiseach and has always been very sound on economic and tax matters, eh, going forward.

It was comforting to hear

Biffo confirm this yesterday in the Dáil, because while some of the biggest property gamblers in the country may be up to their ears in hock to Nama, suspicious people worry that once the public covers the tab for their outrageous bank debts the boys will continue on their merry way in a new class of money-making vehicle.

Eamon Gilmore has a very suspicious mind.

Where the Government sees chastened developers spancelled by liabilities to Nama, Eamon sees loopholes.

During Leaders’ Questions yesterday, he had a very special cohort of The Illustrious Indigent in mind.

“The Golden 10” is what he called them. Remember them? (You might also know them as The Anglo 10, or The Maple 10.) These are the masters of the property universe who were lent €400 million by Anglo Irish Bank, on the strength of the shares they held in Anglo Irish Bank, to buy more shares in Anglo Irish Bank, in order to bail out a fellow shareholder in Anglo Irish Bank, so that the lights didn’t go out in Anglo Irish Bank.

It was a marvellous scam, until the Government nationalised the bank, thus rendering the shares worthless and sticking the unfortunate taxpayer with the bulk of the loan.

Now here’s the bit that has Eamon very exercised. He says that there is a loophole in the tax system which will allow these guys to write off the value of the loans they lost (now shouldered by the taxpayer) against any capital gains liabilities they might incur in the future.

Won’t happen, insisted the Taoiseach.

Anyway, their assets aren’t worth tuppence in the present climate.

This means we all must pray even harder for these assets to appreciate, because if they don’t, Nama will bankrupt us.

But back to The Golden 10. These boys won’t turn a profit on anything, ever, ever again. But if they do, according to the Labour party’s sums, they will have the cushion of an €80 million tax credit in the bank.

Not gonna happen, says the Taoiseach, but not denying that the loophole exists.

Just as well, because Minister for Finance Brian Lenihan is well aware of the same loophole, but in an earlier answer to Joan Burton, he said there are no plans to close it.

Deputy Gilmore was happy to remind Biffo of his Minister’s reply, delivered in the sort of jargon they both adore: “The current symmetry of treatment between losses and gains would be affected and it would represent a significant change to our capital gains tax legislation.”

Sometimes it’s better not to think too deeply about these things. It can all be very upsetting.

So on a happier note, it’s a week to the day since Bertie Ahern and Seánie FitzPatrick (once the figurehead of the great Anglo Irish adventure) attended a function together in Co Wicklow.

The two enjoyed some knockabout banter about the bailout of the banks, and the Bert mused sadly about Anglo’s shares going belly-up.

Still, quipped former taoiseach Ahern to the audience: “I think Seánie has a bit left!” And that’s the thing that has the likes of Eamon Gilmore suspicious and worried.