Dáil Sketch: Who'd have thought it? More than a month after becoming number two to the Taoiseach, the Tánaiste still appears somewhat unfamiliar with his title.
When Fine Gael leader Enda Kenny pressed Michael McDowell about a publication date for the much-leaked O'Neill report on the Leas Cross nursing home, he replied: "The Tánai . . . the former tánaiste Mary Harney has been anxious at all times to publish the report". Official publication is now likely in the next couple of weeks.
But while the title might take some getting used to, there was no hesitation at all with the role and the Tánaiste was beaming, full of bonhomie and banter as he faced allcomers from the Opposition while he took the order of business yesterday.
And there was some unlikely harmony between the Progressive Democrats and Sinn Féin when the Tánaiste beamed across at Caoimhghín Ó Caoláin as he pondered aloud the possibility of his having responsibility for Northern Ireland legislation.
Appropriately enough the issue was fireworks. The Tánaiste, wearing his Justice hat, warned that people who travel North to buy fireworks could have their cars confiscated as well as face criminal proceedings if they are stopped at customs.
But Labour's Joe Costello pointed out that any legislation was ineffective without co-operation on both sides of the Border. The Tánaiste surmised that "it would be my preference that there should be a single regime on both sides of the Border", and then with a big grin he added, "but I'm not in a position yet to legislate for Northern Ireland". Mr Ó Caoláin managed a slight smile at this and said "at least I can agree with the Tánaiste on that".
Earlier, Labour leader Pat Rabbitte showed off his diligent study of Government press conferences and statements. One by Minister of State for Housing Noel Ahern particularly caught his attention, with the suggestion that property speculators should be taxed out of existence.
So, asked Pat, are there such proposals to tax the speculators out of existence? He questioned another statement by Minister for Social and Family Affairs Séamus Brennan who told TV3 at the weekend "that he had discovered money-lenders were operating in our society and that he would introduce legislation to cap interest rates".
The Tánaiste replied that the only wealth tax promise was one Deputy Rabbitte had given in an Irish Times interview.
And the Tánaiste added provocatively that it should be noted that "there is more than one socialist in this House". A comment that drew groans and grins in equal measure, and cries of, "That's right, they're all over here!" from the Labour benches.
