“Rad” or better still, “abso rad”

In being both abbreviated and American, two hallmarks of cool are achieved here. This stems from the school of terms including “totes gorge” and “v delish”. Double-barrell abbreviations are on trend, in just about forming the same functionality as one complete word.

Have a Go at “Festival Girl”

Festival Girl is the scapegoat of the weekend: she can be seen glamping, squealing, and wearing fringed garments (where the degree of fringing can range anywhere between Kate Moss and outright cultural appropriation). She’s mostly harmless, but has the ability to unite hordes of strangers in solidarity with the sentiment: “At least we’re not as bad as Festival Girl.” This is a vaguely unprovable accusation, which confirms its popularity as a festival staple

“On point” or “on fleek”

If certain things are good, they must be referred to using only superlatives or anthropogenesis. The weather, for example, is forecast to be good this weekend. This means that it is either “the best” or “on point”. When global climate patterns or Ferris wheels (above) are both personified and rated, it gives the speaker an undeserved authority on everything, which is arguably the most astoundingly perfect thing ever, etc.

“DJ ____ can’t actually mix”

This is an interchangeable remark for the electronic arena, backed up by the lack of on-stage instruments, thus confirming that the DJ is in fact just pressing play. It’s easier to discredit the big hitters (look out James Murphy) because this implies an inherent support for smaller acts without actually having to know any of them.

Old Timey slang

Address your friends with “Old Bean” and denote the beginning of a jaunt with “pip pip”. Any syntax borrowed from Edwardian times and 1900s gangster lore will fit the bill here, this is possibly caused by an over saturation in telly period dramas, and so an obligatory archaicism has replaced nu slang. “Ah here, leave it out” becomes “Ah, that old chestnut ”.